Friday, March 31, 2006

Vazha Meenu

This is in celebration to the ultimate Gaana genre for which KLKs and Bongo beats originated from. [Note: not vice versa].

This time round, I give you the vid and the "REAL" lyrics.

The "Anglophiled" one will be up as soon as we find out where the old volumes of Lifco Tamil-English dictionaries dissapeared to. Much appreciated if someone can provide the text for us. Email:

Vazhai Meenukum Vilangu meenukum kalyanam
antha senakuni kootamellam oorgolam
antha nadu kadalil nadakuthaiya thirumanam
angu asuru kodi aalukelam kummalam

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh...Kalayanama Kalyanam! Kalayanama Kalyanam!

Oorvalathil aadivarum nanduthane naatiyam
ayya mellam thallam mulangivarum vanjira meenu vaathiyam
Paarai meenu nadathi varar paathiyam
angu ther pola poguthaiya oorgola kaatchiyam

Coovum aaru kadalil serum antha idathil "lavu-ngeh"
itha paathu vitta uluva meenu vatchathaiya vaikungo
Panchayathu thalaivarana sura meenu thaanungo
avar sonna padi iruvarukum nitchaithartham thaanungo
kalyanam nadanthu varuthu paarungo.

Maapillai sontha pandham meesa karar erango
antha nethili podiyum kaara podiyum kalagalanu irukuthu.
Penuku sontha bandham meesa kaara kaduma.
Antha santhana meenum vauval meenum varavazhaipu tharuguthu

Maapillai vazhai meenu pazhavar kaadu thaanungo
antha manna ponnu vilangu meenin meenjuru thaanungo.

Intha thirumanatha nadathivaikum thirukamaalu annango.
Intha manna makalai vazhthukindra periya manusan yaarungo ...?

Thalaivaru thimeengalam thaanungo.

Monday, March 20, 2006


Now, this is a new initiative to involve everyone who reads, contributes, ridicules, advertises and takes a dump on this blog.

The advent of a KLKlossary.

The aim: To come up with a close to comprehensive Kompilation of all terms/phrases/words used by our beloved KLKs.

The event: Read this, and add your own thru the comments. When there's enough, in batches, a seperate KLKlossary page will be updated as an available resource for all. Do note, misspellers, misnomers and ungrammatical mofos, please stay clear. It will be an embarassment only to u, not us.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Koduva Meesai - Dhool

Ikan Kurau Mustache, Parang Look,
Six Face, Put His Hand,Cool!
Cutting teeth, Golden teeth,Next teeth Lion teeth,Cool!

You call me name all,I will tell and beat, cool!
Who come friend me,I give shoulder, cool!
You call me name all,I will tell and beat, cool!
Who come friend me,I give shoulder, cool!

Hey beat the Bongo, beat the Bongo,
Come here Daddy,Cool!
Cool!Beat cool! Beat cool!

Sumall fruit, ladies finger,in girls middle,
Soorakkaa for you, if win, cool,
fat bean, head bean,in speaking middle,
definitely if we catch seed, cool,
Kattabomman grandson,All I touch cool,
Tied up teak body man...
Yeah, Tied up teak body man,
All my get-up cool,
8 Direction my song,
tune can hear cool,

Galay galay galay galay... Come da, You come da...

Sky got horn man,
elephant got tusk man,
people my name is,loving cool (cool!),
lion will roar,
leopard will jump,
all those coming with me,brave cool (cool!),
drizzling in colony,if got backyard cool,
if thirsty in the well...
Yeah if thirsty in the well,
if got water cool,
time will in the ladder,
shake u up cool.

Thursday, March 09, 2006


The very first contributor to KLKillahs, alas the bounds of society have rendered him anonymous. Nameless yet not wordless. Lend him your ears:
[The editors notes are in italics]

I was goin to visit a friend. Just bought a pack of ciggies, peeled of the plastic wrapper on it and took out my 1st stick. Just about to light it, I noticed 2 KLKs approaching me.

Apprehensive now for this was not the place where I usually hung out and if there was any trouble, i won't be able to get anyone to bail me out fast enough. [Why this thought even runs through your head is the problem with KLKs]

They then said hi to me. So i was relieved and thought they wanted to ask for a light. What happened next blew me off totally. Instead of a light, they asked me for a stick itself. I couldn't very well say i don't have because i had just opened my pack. [And don't Klings love to make others liars].

So i gave one to them.

What got me thinking is that how could all these KLKs be so cheap. The thing is simple. If you don't have money to smoke, then don't smoke.

You know what i hate more than an anjadi? A CHEAP anjadi.

End of story, now I speak:

What is with the cheap ones anyway?

Your dad can't open a prata stall cos your schoolmates think it's their obligation to eat free? Your friend can't run a pub cos his friends think that means a license to drink- free?
Your mum is scared to shop at the Indian grocers' cos they inflate and deflate prices as they deem fit?

Ever had a friend ask you for one puff of your cig? What does one puff do, really. Solve your nicotine problem for the next 24 hours before you gotta beg for your next one? How bout if the same mofo asks you for a sip of your beer? You get high on one sip?

Remember there always was one guy in primary/secondary school who jus licked his plate clean but the cutlery remains in his hands, just waiting waiting for you to be done and pop his ultimate anti-climaxial question: "You gonna finish that?"

Vices are fine, just pay your own way through them will ya?
You, KLKanjaPisunaaris.

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Tuesday, March 07, 2006

KLK StreetSoccer

This is the world viewed throught madstrummer's flawed eyes.

4 Fences. In it, 4 Walls.

On those 4 Walls: Bags, Jerseys, Cigg Packs, Lighters, Half-filled bottles of Blueberry Tea, H2O cans, Ice Tea.

Around the walls: Strewn bottles of emptied drinks, Cigg Butts, Bags, Slippers and one corner that constantly smells of piss.

Within the walls: Cussing, Sweating, Throbbin, Kicking, Pulsating, Laughing Mats, Manjans(albeit very few) and last but NOT the least, KLKS.

This be the sight I bear witness to every friday and sunday evenings till late nite.

This be the StreetSoccer court.

And the KLKs who come there. What Colour. What Stories they could tell. What a joke.

1) KLK places cigg in his mouth 30m away from court. Walks into court. Long blonde fringe flopping about in the wind. Long Brown tail swishing in the wind. Sits on one of the walls. Sits. Sits. After 10 mins, just as I am about to offer a light, he lights his cigg. Plays two games. Barefoot(cos he missed his blockshopping appointment). And leaves.

2) KLK comes into court with his friends. Looks small. Plays like a chilli padi. Barefoot as well. Prolly a victim of his own pastime(blockshopping). He targets the new fellas. Clashes wit em. Stares at em. Plays rougher. Understand this; he is all of 5 feet 5 in. A strapping young lad wit the body of a jungle villager. Challengin those who would squash him buy sitting on him. He probably wishes he had a ladder to get outta the court. After awhile the newbies get lost. KLK feels top of the world. Cheers to the KLK spirit.

3) This be an old KLK. Funniest of the lot. Eyes glazed. Grin askew. Comes into court, pre-drunk. Has his stockade wit him( one Guiness Can or a Baron's Bottle).His shoes are too nasty to be shopped i suppose. Starts mouthing off outside court. Continues mouthing off inside court. Lectures everyone on how to shoot, pass, score and save. Takes a SWIG of his poison. Lectures everyone, including those not playing at the moment, on how to tackle, defend, attack, strategise and FALL. This time a bit slurred arredi. Saves full on shots travelling at 80mph wit his head. His HEAD. But lets in goals trickling in by just staring at it. End of it all, stumbles outta the court.

4) And since streetsoccer is played with 4 ppl where i play: Our 4th man. Comes into court like he's going for a tournament. SAF running jersey. Nike Shorts. Nike Ankle socks. Nike Vapor 3 Shoes. Whoever shops him hits the jackpot. Tall as a bonsai tree. Come to think of it, shaped like one too. Helluva Drbbler. Adept at bringin the ball all the way upto the the opponents "D" area to lose it. Master of the miss-pass. But then again, everyone has bad moments in a game. His job is to remind them of just that. And remind those watching as well.

Bark, Scowl, Shout, Fume. Dribble Dribble Lose ball Chase Back Hack Hack Hack Elbow Dribble Dribble Lose Shout Fume. Restart.

Well, i'll admit. None of em are violent. I mean violent as in "I'm gonna play soccer and break faces at the same time" violent. Or Violent as in, " U tackle me and u aint walking home" violent. But my friday evenings would not be the same without these people. And i would fully recommend you come down and witness this menagerie for yourself.

Its 100% SAFE. I guarantee it.

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